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Friday, September 10, 2004

RULEZ...

OK. This will be off the top of my head, so I'm sure I will forget something - bear with me, and be ready for updates later on....

I've been on this earth for over 1/4 of a century - nigh 30 years. Here is a list of things I've discovered so far (you may think of them as rules to life, especially for guys):

1. Never get a haircut that has a name (i.e. mullet, buzzcut, etc)

2. Always keep chocolate in your pocket to give to girls (I get asked by girls for chocolate about 14.8 times more often than I think about the movie Contact).

3. You can never go wrong in blowing off work for something like fishing.

4. It's alot easier to just avoid stepping in dog shit to begin with than it is to clean it off.

5. Generally speaking, hippies are far less cool than they seem.

6. There are some things in life on which it is not wise to be frugal when purchasing. Examples include wine, coffee, hot dogs (credit to G-Had's dad for pointing this out), toothpaste, bicycles)

7. There are some things in life on which it is wise to be frugal when purchasing. Examples include gin (try Barton's), potato chips (most off-brand potato chips have something weird about them that actually makes them better, or at least more interesting to eat, than name-brand chips), and flies (like for flyfishing).

8. Just never answer the phone.

9. There is such a thing as 'too much of a good thing.' I'm thinking, here, of bacon grease.

That's about all I've really learned, so far.

***************************


Oh. So I'm thinking of dressing up as a Wooly Bugger for Halloween. A Woolly Bugger is a fly and it looks like this:



I was thinking I would buy some fake fur to make a top, paint my head gold, and wear a grass skirt type of thing. Oh, and buy some number 9 wire and bend it to make a hook that will protrude from my nether regions.

Comments?

-m




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