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Saturday, December 04, 2004

Goddamn I hate Scattergories.

'Bout the only things worse are chiggers, cancer, sitcoms, Manheim Steamroller, and business majors.


Friday, December 03, 2004


I've been listening to the following incessantly:

Dear Catastrophe Waitress, by Belle & Sebastian
Oh, Inverted World, by The Shins
Stranger in this Place, by Killbilly
Under the Western Freeway, by Grandaddy
Grown Backwards, by David Byrne


In other not-news...I'm interested to see how a non-geographer would do at this.

Please try and submit your scores (via comments).

G-Had got a 100%, I got a 98% (I really screwed up on Maryland, which was the 2nd state I had to place). It's pretty easy if you start with coastal states, but much more difficult if you start with, say, WV, MO, IA, CO, UT, NE, etc.


Monday, November 29, 2004


Well, I wish I could say something eventful and newsworthy happened over my Thanksgiving break excursion. This is basically it:

1. Ate thanksgiving with mom/grandma/grandpa/grandma's old, old sisters, which was kind of a hoot, really. My grandpa and I only enjoyed 1 large whiskey-type toddy this time..

One other time (a very mini play):

Me: "I like whiskey - I kind of like gin, too."
My Grandpa: "I had to stop drinking gin. It makes me horny."


2. Moved my dad from his temporary apt. to his permanent one (in Crete, NE). My sister and I both agreed his new place was pimp - it has a 60's style fake fireplace and an enormous doorbell. I mean the doorbell unit itself - usually inconspicuous, in most houses, but prominent to the point of hilarity, in this place..

3. It snowed an assload. Smack on the route we were driving, on the day of the snow. 20 mph on interstate 80. At least all the truckers had chosen a different route, so there weren't any amphetamine-whacked-out truck drivers still barreling along at 80 mph. There were ALOT of cars in the ditches. We didn't have any problems. The fast-driving Colorado A-holes were quickly weeded out into the median or ditch, which were filled with big puffy snow, so it didn't seem like anyone really got hurt.

4. My application for the teaching position in Dublin, Ireland, was received...awaiting word..

Things I've realized in the last 4 or 5 days:

1. My family is messed up. Seriously. But, in spite of all the issues, they're still lovable. Perhaps it's a redemption story in progress. I hate redemption stories.

2. I am just as mature as a 5th grade boy. I think I may have made some progress at some stage in my life, but I've regressed right back down there. I'm OK with that. Probably doesn't help my moodiness, though. Also, applying tentative, raw 5th-12th grade (or maybe caveman) level emotions to real live adult issues isn't very practical or useful.

3. Even though the only other things my grandpa knows how to make are fried eggs, roasted peanuts, whiskey beverages, and popcorn, he makes the best damned stuffing ever. (I've probably realized this before...)

4. If I want to know any news items from or about my family, I will have to call/email/visit the relevant parties and ask direct questions, because word-of-mouth obviously ain't gettin' it.

5. Pickled herring is OK. Rubbery, bony. But OK.

6. Mincemeat pie is OK. Kind of like runnier shoefly pie. But with meat shards.

7. My cousin is like a magnet for weirdness or something. First, he has a random guy randomlydie in his front yard under his tree. Then, an obsessive Native American woman (he thinks) stalks him all over the country. Finally, just as he sits down in his recliner, after picking up his house one day, an ancient old lady walks in carrying a windsock. I won't go into the whole story, but suffice to say, that it was a very, very funny story. Even when told by my mom, who sometimes tells me stories about something that supposedly happened to some kid of a person she knows last week, but actually happened to me when I was 7. Do all moms suck at telling stories?

Yeah. That's what's happened to me in 5 days.


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